Post-Structuralists Under Represented in NCAA Football Coaching Ranks, Says Highly Interpretive Report

PARIS—At a special luncheon held for the press on Sunday, Yves Chevrier, President of Ecole des Hautes Etudes Sociales, released a new report denouncing a perceived under-representation of post-structuralists among NCAA football head coaches. Through examining the wording of over two hundred head coaching contracts and then separating the use of language from the authorial intent of both coaches and Athletic Directors, Chevrier concluded that post-structuralists are institutionally discriminated against by “a NCAA trapped in the paradigms of a bourgeois, white male mentalite.” “Whenever a post-structuralist wishes to question the fundamental tenet of an A.D.’s worldview and show the hyper-unreality that is the shadows and light of college football, he or she is rebuffed. Why? Do they fear that we may expose their games for what they are, a celebration of the artificial masculine binary?” Myles Brand, NCAA President, was quick to denounce the accusation that there was any sort of conscious effort to keep prominent post-structuralists such as Jacques Derrida, Julia Kristeva, and Jean-Luc Nancy, from receiving interviews for high profile job openings at Auburn, Tennessee, and Clemson. “I’ve spoken to Monsieur Chevrier before and I will tell you now what I’ve already told him – the NCAA does not discriminate based on race, creed, religion, gender, or interpretation of signifier/signified relationship.”

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